My 9-year-old came to me in tears last weekend. Not the fickle kind of tears but the real ones. The life is hard ones that leak down your face uncontrollably and leave you exhausted.
He wasn’t hurt and he wasn’t sick. He was scared.
My heart may have stopped beating for a minute. This was so unlike my fearless, brave and fun boy. I couldn’t imagine what he could be scared of. The answer was life.
Life was moving too fast. He wanted to stop time or at the very least try to slow it down. He wasn’t ready to be ten. WTH? He just turned nine!
Then he told me about his worries for the future. What was he going to do for a job? But mostly he feared he might not be a “good adult”.
I was dumbfounded. Anyone who knows my youngest, knows what a pragmatic dynamo he is. He is the King of Positivity and generally appears blasê about most things. Clearly, there is a factory of information processing behind those piercing blue eyes.
Scooping him up, I assured him that he was an amazing person and well on his way to being a “good adult” because he was kind, compassionate, clever, strong, curious…..
It left me thinking. How can I slow down? We keep a pretty steady pace in our household (3 boys). Full school days, after school activities (2-3 hours) each evening, and homework. More activities through the weekend, birthday parties, play dates, tournaments. Plus, we entertain a lot (a perk of living abroad), we travel on most holidays, and Dad is often away through the week. Life is busy. But is it too busy?
Who knows? I’m just winging it like every other parent out there. But, I do know that I’m not too busy to remind my guys that they’re doing a good job, or to stand on them when they’re not.
I decided to make a list for my guy.
Ten Things to REmember
- Mistakes are okay, but learn from them.
- You got this!
- I’ve got you!
- Time is a gift.
- Find your passion.
- Love wins.
- Kindness is free.
- Honesty is always the best policy.
- You are loved.
- You must fall down or you will never learn how to get up.
As parents, we must remember to check in with our kids. It may appear they’re doing okay, but it never hurts to ask. I’ve found out loads of intel these last couple of days by taking the time to ask the right questions.
Parenting….really is a never-ending learning curve. x
Did you enjoy this article? Can you relate? Would love to hear from you! x